Dexter Iowa Community Site

Consider this quote from Abe Lincoln

"America will never be destroyed from the outside. If we falter and lose our freedoms, it will be because we destroyed ourselves."

I feel a little out of touch with the world lately. My radio is somewhere in storage and since I don't have that hour long commute to work in the morning anymore I don't catch much news. One has to pick and choose between the national news networks and spend a little time poking around to find the real stories.

Friday morning as I was preparing to fix a lunchmeat sandwich and dig out that bag of chips for my noon time meal I listened to the television as the broadcasting world stopped to allow golfer Tiger Woods to read a well prepared statement concerning the big hub bub surrounding his marriage. I will admit that I only listened half heartedly as I'm not much of a golf fan, nor do I get too wound up in the feeding frenzy of celebrities lives.

We have more than enough air time wasted on things that no one in their right mind should really care about. There's Entertainment Tonight, TMZ and a host of other great "journalistic" programs that make sure you and I are allowed to follow every foot step of our favorite star.

As the news reporters debated what was said, the tone of the speech and which demographic would get warm fuzzy's from the speech and forgive Tiger for his faults, it made me sit back and think for a minute.

Who would want to be a star? To have every aspect of your life looked at, dissected, poured over, talked about and brought up at every oportunity until you were hounded into moving into some nondescript block building behind tall fences and live your life much like Howard Hughes. Is that really worth the money and fame that comes with being a celebrity?

Then it dawned on me! I realized that in some ways being a star is like living in a small town! Yeah, so maybe we don't have fancy houses, more cars than we know what to do with and maybe none of us really can just hop on a plane and fly to some tropical day spa because we feel stressed, but think about it for just an instance.

Do you get recognized when you go out? Do people yell out your name and wave when you cross the street? Have you ever been the subject of idle gossip at the coffee shop? Do you ever hear things that your kids have done before they are even home yet?

Sure, we all have. It's the blessing and curse of living in a small town. We know everyone. And generally we know what's going on in the lives of the people around us. We celebrate with them when things are good, and we talk about them in hushed tones when they aren't so good. Maybe in a way we are all celebrities for a little while in the spaces we live in. Yes, we don't have gaggles of photographers following our every moves, but we certainly can understand the plight of being the center of attention when you really don't want to be.

In all honesty, Tiger's issue is a personal one. It isn't even that remotely interesting after you've heard about it the first time. In my own small town voice, when asked if I had heard about it, I said, "Yeah, it's too bad." Really what more was there to say? Much in the same way when something bad happens to someone we know, or maybe just have heard of. Why is it wired into some of us to sit and gossip and talk about them as though by talking about it we're going to do some good for them? Rarely is there a person who has the guts to come straight up to someone and get the straight truth, the real story and offer genuine help. No, for some it is much easier to hide behind the curtains in the picture window and peer out into the world with our comments.

My challange for each of you this week is to stop and think for a moment. Have you been on either side of gossip, or have had people delve into your personal life when they really had no business being there? Ask yourself was it helpful to you? Did it bring about a positive impact? Or did it in the end just cause more hurt and anguish for people who were just going through a tough time in thier lives.

I know that I've been on both sides. As a newspaper man that was part of my job. To take gossip or tips and look at them to decide which parts were newsworthy. But these days I catch myself being less tollerant of gossip. I try to ignore it as much as I can, and where I can help rather than spending idle time wrapping myself up in the lives of other people, I'm trying hard to resist the temptation, and to make sure that if I need to feel involved that my actions and words are of a caring and helpful nature. It's not always easy, but it's the way I want to be treated by others, and I'm sure Tiger, and you probably feel the same way.

See you next week. Remember...we're all in this together.