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Consider this quote from Abe Lincoln
"America will never be destroyed from the outside. If we falter and lose our freedoms, it will be because we destroyed ourselves."
By the time you pick the paper up this week and are reading this I would imagine that the gates have opened to the biggest showcase of agriculture in the country and you’ve probably thought to yourself why hasn’t Weez given us tips on getting around the State Fair this year? Well fear not, here are my tips to enjoy the Fair.
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People say the Fair is too expensive. I can honestly say that I’ve done the Fair on $30 for an entire day. Look for bargains, especially the half price admission after 5 p.m. and on the last day of the Fair. Parking can be pricey depending on how close you want to be, but it is still cheapest to park at the Capitol and take the shuttle directly to the Grand Ave. gate.
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You will be bombarded by food choices. For those of you who park in the lots around the fairgrounds, think about packing a picnic lunch to leave in the car and take some time at noon to wander out and have lunch in the parking lot. A simple stamp will get you back into the gates when you are over and you just saved a ton of money that you can spend later on something deep fried.
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Remember to climb the hill in the morning first thing and work your way down. This is the best suggestion I could give anyone as by the time you get around to going up the hill late in the day your legs are probably going to refuse.
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Many buildings are air conditioned. My favorite so far has to be the Jacobsen Arena where you can sit and watch most of the horse shows for free in the comfort of the air and it isn’t so loud that you can’t sit and have a conversation with someone.
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Be courteous to other people. If you see someone you know…which in my case happens every few minutes, step out of the line of travel along sidewalks to visit. It is only kind to everyone behind you who are trying to get somewhere.
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Jr. Doughnuts are best eaten right out of the cooker, but if you happen to have a bag that survives the trip home 20 seconds in the microwave will fix that.
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Traffic flows in a clockwise circle in the Agriculture Building. Remember that.
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There are many water fountains where one can refill a water bottle, and if they have forgotten to reset the machines from county fair, try the pop machines in the Sheep Barn for a cheaper sweet soda than what you can buy elsewhere.
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Pace yourself. It can be a bit overwhelming to try to get everywhere at once, but if you take it easy you will find you have much more energy throughout the day. If you get too hot…find somewhere cool and if you need to rest find a place to rest.
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There are trashcans everywhere. Don’t litter.
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Poncho Dogs are the only real corn dog that you should eat.
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Lemon Shake up’s are awesome and if you refill them with water you can get a two for one out of them.
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Remember that livestock poops and they still sell rubber spiders. Look down and up when walking in the livestock barns.
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The Varied Industry building is best done towards the end of your day so you don’t have to carry around the entire a bag of worthless handouts that you won’t look at again when you get home. Besides your football poster won’t get squished as well.
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Finally, remember that not everyone at the Fair understands livestock or Iowans. Be friendly but not overly cocky when you have to gently remind them of the difference between a boar and a sow. See you next week….Have Fun at The Fair and remember, we’re all in this together.