Dexter Iowa Community Site

Consider this quote from Abe Lincoln

"America will never be destroyed from the outside. If we falter and lose our freedoms, it will be because we destroyed ourselves."

Dear Santa,

     I hope this letter finds you well. I was thinking the other day that in your advanced age and with your increased work load you must find your free time very limited these days. Also knowing that you’ve been married as long as you have must be also hard on you. I can imagine that Mrs. Claus probably has tried to have one of the elves smother you in your sleep more than once. As you know I’ve tried to be a really good boy this year, even though sometimes it has been pretty darn hard to be good, but I would say that on average my good days have overwhelmed my bad days.

     I wanted to say thank you for allowing me to fill in for you this year that evening in Adair. It was a great bunch of fun although the beard was a little itchy and the one little girl who sat on my lap and screamed kind of spooked me. Do you find it hard to get qualified elves to make all those new electronic toys the boys and girls ask for? Not one of them asked for a Barbie this year, although the boys over at the American Doll factory should stay busy for quite some time.

     Well you probably realize that this isn’t just one of those out of the blue greetings, and I am sure you would be quite disappointed if I didn’t ask for just a few things. I have also enclosed some requests for some people that needed a little help along the way.

     For President Obama, I would like to ask for a little humility. I think he’s got a rough road ahead but I believe he’s missing something that made him human before he was elected.

     For the Congress, could you bring them some common sense? No one expects them to agree, but the drawing lines in the sand is getting pretty old.

     For my friends who have lost a loved one this year, I ask for peace and that gentle voice that comes reminding them they are not alone.

     For all those church ladies that chore over every fund raising supper, could you bring them full collection plates and the understanding that the love they put into their meals means more than bringing in money to pay for a building or for the budget, but ministers to those of us who couldn’t make a meal that good to save our lives.

     For every young man who isn’t the most talented player on the baseball team could you bring them a copy of “Here in Right Field” by Peter, Paul and Mary?

     For my friends at US Cellular could you bring them a clue about customer service and hold times? Seven phone calls and over six hours of on hold time and still not having a working hot spot is a bit ridiculous!

     For the farmers I would like to ask for a fairly normal spring, just enough dry time to get the field work done and the crops in and just enough rain not to make it all happen within two weeks.

     For those in elected offices in small towns, could you bring them a sense that they aren’t being witch-hunted, which would be much better liked if they tried not to act like Napoleons.

    For this columnist, could you leave a list of possible column ideas to draw from when my mind is blank?

     For those who struggle to find money to pay the bills and for groceries, how about a raise or even a new job providing them with a livable wage?

     For the car dealer in Des Moines who wouldn’t deal with me on a used car because he “was worried he would open himself up to extra expenses if he fixed a broken sensor” a giant lump of coal would be appropriate.

     For those who live alone, or are alone and can’t seem to find someone could you bring them a little hope?

    Finally I wanted to thank you for leaving me the gift of napping last year. It has been overly successful except for that one safety meeting I nodded off in at work, but it was well worth it. Please give my best to the gang up there at the North Pole and if you wouldn’t mind keeping a little bit of the cold air up there that would be fine with me. See you when you get here, the kids will set out the milk and cookies and always if you’re needing a nip of the hard stuff you know it’s in the freezer.